Saturday, August 23, 2008

Soldier Braves Challenges of Life

Remembering Jeet with her precious baby

It was in Jun 55 that I was married to my second wife, my first marriage; it was with all the pomp and ceremony with the Parade the marching columns and the Brass band in attendance. There were VIP’s presiding and relations, friends, colleagues, and a multitude of others present. I was on top of the world, having just braved the long and arduous ceremony, still decked in finery.

Little did I know that my new wife, my new love, had other plans for me. Demanding total submission, whimsical and unpredictable by nature, expecting and getting 24-hour attention, her control over me was total- deep, pervasive and complete, courtesy the ubiquitous Tele J (that was what we had those days to communicate).

My life style was totally controlled by her norms; I was reminded time and again that I had to follow the customs inherited from her forefathers. I did not even have choice of what I ate and when I ate, the timings were fixed; the menu was decided a week in advance.

Periodically, I would be taken out in wilderness, to asses how well I had been conditioned, physically and mentally even when deprived of basic comforts. I would , at times, even be put under test to determine if I was brave enough to face a bullet to keep her honor. However, I was still infatuated by her and the style, glamour and prestige accruing for having tied the knot with her

Then one day she had competition, her own doing, as she permitted me to marry a second time, to my first wife. I was in euphoria once again; the two of us living in our own world, alas the paradise lasted, only, till the leave of absence, a wedding gift, having run its course, came to an end. I was in a dilemma. Short of words and bereft of any logic to convince her, as to why she, a citizen, free to travel anywhere in the country, could not accompany me to where I was going. I did not have any option but to report back to the Second, abandoning the bride of few days, leaving her perplexed and heartbroken. It was some thing that happened time and time again.

Alas, one day, exactly after 30 years of devoted servitude, the Second, perpetually young, decided that I had become too old for her and pensioned me off.

I was now free to spend more time with Jeet and try to compensate for having neglected her all this time. The damage however had already been done, the pain suffered, hurt felt and tensions borne during the earlier life, had their cumulative effect and one day she also left me for her heavenly abode.

Abandoned by one and discarded by the other, I, now left alone, divide my lonely hours, longingly looking at the Photo hanging on the wall and with nostalgia at the uniform in the cupboard.

Brig Lakhsman Singh, VSM (Retd)

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